Saturday, February 28, 2009

How not to win at NASCAR fantasy games

The Rev loves NASCAR racing and loves to play as many NASCAR fantasy games as he can remember to enter each week, but he is not very good at it. We offer this item as a general "What not to do" guide for fantasy racing, compiled from personal failure experience.

Our reader may have noticed that Rev' Jim's RantsnRaves discontinued posting our weekly race previews during last season. This wasn't because we were lazy, but because we were so disappointed in how consistently wrong we were it was becoming embarrassing. Here are some of the methods of picking drivers for our weekly pick five/six/ten games that we have used (or not) to achieve such great mediocrity:

The Favorite Driver Method: Certainly our favorite driver has to be a good driver. If we keep picking him every week, he has to win and pay off sometime, right? Using this method, our pick five picks for the Shelby 427 at Las Vega Motor Speedway this weekend would be as follows:

Tony Stewart
Matt Kenseth
Elliott Sadler
David Stremme
Kyle Busch

Considering the track, this may actually be a good pick, if we are lucky.

The He Looks Good Method: This is similar to the "Favorite Driver" method, except it is based on the driver's appearance. It utilizes the same principle as "Dierks Bentley is a country music singer" or "Bruce Springsteen kicked a$$ at the Super Bowl Half-time." For example, Bentley sings a mixed style of Southern Rock/Popular Rock music with a barely discernible twang.But he looks good and we like country music, so he must be a country music singer. Or, as in the other example, Bruce Springsteen's half-time show consisted of him shouting out the lyrics to some of his greatest hits in a flat monotone--which, frankly, was very depressing to some of us who remembered seeing him perform when he was at his peak. But, he looked good, so his show was a smashing success.

Using this principle, the top five (for some fans) should be:

Kasey Kahne
Dale Earnhardt, Jr
Jeff Gordon
Elliott Sadler
Bobby Labonte

The Reverse Jinx Method:

This one always works for The Rev when he wants to score very low for a certain week. It is based on the premise that whoever you pick in your pick five, will have some kind of mechanical failure, accident, or penalty that will put him out of the race. This method should only be used if you want to see one or more of your favorite drivers have a better chance at winning, due to the fact that the least favorite drivers you picked didn't finish the race, and you really don't care about your fantasy racing results. Using this method, Rev' Jim's picks this week would be:

Carl Edwards
Paul Menard
Jimmie Johnson
Michael Waltrip
Joe Nemecheck

Of course, as always, when you expect the reverse jinx factor to come into play, it doesn't, so this could be exactly the way the top five turns out Sunday.

The Thinking Man's Method:

This is the most widely used method. You read what the "experts" think (Rev' Jim is a fanatical fan, not an expert), study the stats for each driver at the particular venue; find a trend in a driver's luck and experience that may prove favorable to his at the track in question; and try to form your own opinion based on what everybody else is saying. Using this method, The Rev's picks would be:

Jimmie Johnson
Matt Kenseth
Tony Stewart
Kyle Busch
Carl Edwards.

Note, this method hardly ever works for The Rev, and is the method he was using last year before he quit featuring the weekly race previews.

Last, but not least, The Astrological Predictions Method:
Clance' McClannahan makes astrological predictions on her blog "The Church of the Great Oval. Whether you believe Astrology or not, her predictions are often eerily accurate. Rev' Jim has not, however, posted his picks based on Clance's predictions for fear of the reverse jinx factor setting in and really screwing up the Multiverse. Instead we will follow the advice she gives, as quoted from this post at COTGO:

"Fantasy players, just close your eyes and pick a driver this week
It's anyone's dance in Vegas"

Here are some fun free weekly NASCAR fantasy games in which The Rev participates:

Driving Cash Racing--pays the winners at the end of the season. Not a big purse, but what do you want for free? Pick one driver in each of the top three series--Sprint Cup, Nationwide, and Camping World Truck Series--who you think will win each race. Even if your driver doesn't win but leads the most laps, you will get a good score.

One and Done Pick one driver to win each week, and score the driver's points for that race. Once you pick a driver, you may not use him for the rest of the game segment. Simple and fun, just like Steve and Charlie, the owners of the blog. Great prizes, especially for a free game. Heck, the prizes are better than some games you have to pay to join.

NASCAR Challenge (Facebook url, but also available on Myspace) A pick five game. Choose your line-up. You may keep the same line-up or change it every week. No declared prizes, for bragging rights and fun.

NASCAR Tipping A pick 6 game on Facebook. For bragging rights only, but lots of fun.

Whether you play or not, this weekend should give us some great racing. The track is fast, the tires are good, for once, and there are 43 drivers who are out to win. Enjoy the races and good luck!


Charlie said...

You missed one method that ought to be pretty effective Rev. Choose anybody but Charlie's pick. I am THE worst! Except for Steve. He's worser. Thanks for the plug for our One and Done game. We're having fun with it and the prize chest is getting even better.

jimmccoy22 said...

As Winston Churchill said:
Never, never, never, never give up.

Even a broken clock is right twice a day!

Trixie said...

Another method on "how to not to win"...listen to your husband. Luckily for me I didn't for the One and Done league, but the others I did...and well I had a Matt Kenseth kind of day--full of promise but blew up and finished dead last.